By Dan Gordon
I’ve improvised with several teams for a little over 6 years and have realized that each team has its own unique style. I wanted to share a little bit about what happens behind the stage before a show begins with my current group, the CIC house team, COUNTER PRODUCTIVE LOVER.
SHOW PREPARATION
Generally, every team does warm ups to instill a collective focus and energy. CPL does this too, but it is a very unique type of focus that I have yet to encounter on any other squad. Most groups mesh well and hang as a group outside of rehearsals and yet don’t really settle into each other when prepping for a show, relenting to hardcore concentration.
Here is the rundown of an average warm up before a 10:30p Weekend Showcase:
10:05 – Most of CPL has arrived at CIC.
10:10 – CPL claims the dressing room (The Hilarium).
10:11 – Someone asks where Anthony is. He is probably outside hand-rolling a cigarette like a hipster.
10:12 – Someone just got a text from Amy saying she forgot about the show and will be there shortly. The last word of the text ends with either “f#%@” or “C&*%”.
10:15 – Someone closes the door and shuts off the lights.
10:15:05 – Scott grabs Sean’s penis.
10:16 – Everyone has completed their second beer.
10:18 – Amy has arrived. She enters in a whirl of curses and violence.
10:18:28 – Amy has completed her second beer.
10:19 – Word Association games have begun to sharpen our wits. Innocently it begins, then ends one of three ways:
A) The group is standing, reviewing the patterns in unison, arms around each other, aroused and ready to regret whatever happens happily.
B) The warm up quickly devolves into laughing, cursing, where personal
Insults are dished out ruthlessly and cause individual check-ins of the self.
C) The warm up is replaced by a violent frenzy of fists, kicks, slaps (All in the
Dark, mind you), bites and kisses. One or more people will undoubtedly
The Hilarium with a notable injury.
10:27 – Scott releases Sean’s penis.
10:29 – Places.
10:34 – The team has become distracted and has reached that “group mind”
and is startled when its fun is so rudely interrupted by the host calling Counter Productive Lover to the stage.
11:00 – After the audience has found their melted faces on the floor and reapplied them back to their skulls thankfully, the drinking resumes backstage.